I woke up this morning to find words like "OLDIE" "PERVET" "CHILD ABUSE" written at my door. I instantly knew who did it, Ifem's sense of humor runs on the dark side.
"please oo, whosever is using my door to rehearse for spelling bee should desist from it, this is so not Funny" I shouted while using my palms and elbows to clean the mess, then I found out it was carved into the door! The paint was just finishing touch. I was so furious that I screamed.......
Lucy came out of her room to join me at the corridor suppressing laughter, she almost choked on it, I gave her my sternest look to show her I won't appreciate her laughter at this moment.
"YOU know Ifem did it" she whispered to me, I nodded in confirmation, nobody else is capable of this except the she-goat and she will think I will see it and laugh.
I couldn't take it anymore, I was annoyed I have to express it, so I started shouting and swearing, going from corridor to kitchen to Parlour raising my voice and my feet whenever I pass Ifem's door. She is a heavy sleeper but I want to wake her so she can come and witness her Fine Penmanship displayed at my door.
Lucy was still following me about pleading I stop causing a racket, the Landlady who lives in the next compound might hear, and other tenants might also report to her even if she didn't hear. And all these commotion is for her grandson, how happy do you think she will be with both of you, Lucy tried to reason with me.
"Is it worth it? Lucy asked me, maybe the Landlady will congratulate you and allow us live rent free for the rest of our lives or maybe she will serve us Quit notice and we will start going from agent to agent househunting under the hot sun"
I pretend not to hear her terrible reasoning, I keep on shouting, then I started pounding on Ifem's door, I was almost ready to fight her, I am tired of being the peacekeeper. She wisely or mousely played Possum till I got tired of Marching up and down, Dressed up for work and left.
Later I got a message at work from her.
"forgive me Eureee, I will repaint the door, let's be civil to one another please".
This can never be the end of it, she must explain the "PERVET" word. Am having none of this half hearted apology from someone as cold as Ifem the ice Queen
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